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| Personal and Spiritual Growth A forum to discuss propogating the soul and aspects of spirituality and religion. The topic of religion can sometimes become heated- so please try to maintain respect. |
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14-04-2006, 11:14 AM
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Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
I should start off by stating that I am not Christian. I was raised in a vaguely Christian household (in that we celebrated the holidays and my father at least assumed that we all believed in Jesus) but I am not Christian. I suppose the best way to describe myself is Pagan Agnostic. My husband is Agnostic at best, but down right Atheistic at times. Now that we have a child (four and a half months old or so), I find myself really thinking about the holidays . .. the presence of Easter right around the corner doesnt help.  Back home (I am American) it would be easy to celebrate holidays only in a more Pagan way as many Christian holidays fall into the same time period as the Pagan ones (an ancient conversion tool used by the early Christian evangelists). But here, as Pagan holidays run by the season, not the calendar date, it is impossible to do that. Myself and my husband usually dont bother with holidays as much beyond the obligatory family gatherings that, if we didnt attend, we'd get lots of grief.But what do we do now that we have Rowan? Do we arbritarily celebrate holidays in which we dont believe just to "be like everyone else"? Do we continue with Santa Claus because its fun for kids but ignore the fact that we dont believe in Jesus or that he was born on Dec 25? The same with Easter and the Easter Bunny? Or, do we try to celebrate the Pagan holidays at their proper times according to the season and, consequently, be totally out of sync with most everyone else? What do the rest of you non Christians do with your kids in this context? If you have chosen not to be hypocritical (I feel that celebrating something I dont believe in just to be like everyone else to be somewhat hypocritical) how do your kids deal with it? How do you "make it up to them" that they are not doing the same things as their friends at certain times of the year? Ah, homeschooling is starting to sound more and more appealing .. . But even then, they'll have freinds who are doing things the "normal" way . . .
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14-04-2006, 11:19 AM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
I'd say stick to your beliefs. It's not that big of an issue to be out of sync with everyone else, especially if Rowan knows how special your celebrations are to you. I went to school with a boy who didn't celebrate holidays because of his family's beliefs. The rest of us felt sorry for him (oh no! no Christmas presents!) until he explained what his family believed and celebrated. It sounded so wonderous and special that he was the envy of us all!
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14-04-2006, 11:29 AM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
That's the thing, though . . . in a world without Rowan (heh, spot the Pagan influences even in my naming him), I wouldnt celebrate anything really. I'm so non practicing its sad.  Hence the Agnostic tacked onto Pagan.
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14-04-2006, 11:43 AM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
Celebrations don't have to have religious undertones or reasons. Maybe something simple like celebrating the change of seasons, or the moon or the other life-cycles of the environment? Things like that are pretty amazing to children (and some of us adults!). Personally, I think experiencing the joy of something celebrated is really special. Especially if it's unique. I don't know! lol
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14-04-2006, 11:57 AM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
We don't celebrate the traditional holy days because of the pagan background as you said, although we do believe in a Creator etc. We choose to follow the biblical holidays and cop a few odd looks from people when we tell them we don't celebrate easter etc. I'm sure most people think we are JW's although nothing could be further from the truth! I reckon celebrate whatever you like and are comfortable with (aren't I a great evangelist LOL) people usually get over it and more and more people are moving away from empty, shallow traditions and looking for more meaning in their lives, and if people are disrespectful towards you just laugh them off, its hard but even my in laws have gotten used to the fact we don't do xmas, andthey are so big on it!
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Nikki Wife to DH for 5 years  Mother to DD for 2.5 years   Due Late November!  Doula in Training
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14-04-2006, 12:02 PM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
We celebrate (well perhaps enjoy a nice family time) on most Christian holidays which for me feel like a cultural thing because we live in a still (mostly) Christianised society and so by the same token if I lived in Pakistan I'd mark the major festivals there because it's happening in the dominant culture around me. Did that make sense? LOL. There are revised pagan festival wheels that help me pick and choose other more earth-centred and woman-centred times to mark and celebrate which might be of interest to you. There's a nice one at www.goddess.com.au We're definitely not Christians here, DP is an avowed atheist and I'm more spiritual than religious IYKWIM.
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14-04-2006, 12:32 PM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
We celebrate the major holidays that society around us does (easter and Christmas etc). For Christmas I tell Casper that it is a time to celebrate friendship and thank our friends and loved ones for all their help and friendship through the year- hense the present giving. Easter- we explain as a celebration of new life- flowers, babies, animals etc, and eggs represent new life because they are baby chickens. Confused?? My 3yr old prob is too... but we dont "do" organised religion in any form and so far this is working. Happy Easter to all the Christians today though!!!!
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Emma Living and loving and learning with 2 adored children "Childhood is not a preparation for life, childhood is life. A child isn't getting ready to live, a child is living" John Taylor, 1991, Notes from an unfinished journey.
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14-04-2006, 12:38 PM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
I dont believe in god or anything like that and find the reigion in most "religious" holidays is gone. I try to make them more family orientated than their original meaning. I think this is what i will pass on to our kids, that it is more about family and togetherness than anything else. And that presents are a way to show people you appriciate and love them. By presents i mean....home made gifts or "experiences" like a picnic/horse riding/zoo.
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natalie  stevieJARRAH Jan 2005 and BONNY Dec 2006 ~~~~~my water babies~~~~~
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14-04-2006, 12:42 PM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
I have made a conscious decision not to celebrate any Christian holidays for now. My upbringing could be best described as agnostic though there are Atheist and Catholic branches of my family. We did always celebrate Christmas and Easter in the sense that we gave presents and chocolate etc and had a family meal at Christmas. In the future we may find some meaning in these holidays and feel some desire to mark them, that is fine but for now it just feels like a reason to spend money that I don't have for a holiday that is not within my beliefs. That said I am today singing some contemporary sacred music texts (Seven Last Words From the Cross) in st Johns Anglican Cathedral this evening in the choir I am a member of. It is a bit of a contradiction I know. To sing truthfully I try to interpret the text and music in a way that is relevant to me. If I cannot do that then I act or imagine it means something to me. I am aware that I am singing something that is very meaningful to many people out there and I try to do it justice. As a performer you put your self in the shoes of others all the time I guess. Sorry to highjack!
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Mum to a 4 year old DS - breastfeeding and unschooling and loving it!
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14-04-2006, 04:34 PM
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Re: Christian holidays . . . to celebrate or not to celebrate and how?
We're atheists but obviously can't discount or completely opt out of the predominant cultures we were raised in (Christian and Muslim). After all it's the 'family' in the celebrations that mean so much to our parents and relatives. So when we're in Australia to some extent we tag along for Easter and Christmas (which my mother is crazy about while claiming that all religion is brainwashing!) and when we're in Bangladesh we go along with the Eid festivities. That said, we actually follow our son's lead...for example we don't talk about God or Santa but he has picked up a lot from his years in childcare and sometimes brings them up in conversation. We try not to be hypocritical but also not to rubbish the beliefs of others. For Christmas last year 'Santa' filled a stocking with a few small items for DS and he received about five or six other sets of gifts from rellies and friends but we didn't get him anything. Oh and Christmas lunch was yum cha at a restaurant in Chinatown with all the other heathens! That's about as low key as we can manage. 
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