The impact of going from two to three

Jasper · #1 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 03:51 PM

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Im sorry if this is in the wrong spot, had no idea where to put it.
Im thinking about TTC #3, I have some major things to work through first as I suffered physicly with my first pregnancy and emotionally with nasty Prenatal Depression in my second. I hate being pregnant but I love the end result.
Im also thinking about what impact going from two kids to three will be, ie finances, more room, emotional impact on the family and everything in between. I find that I give so much of myself to my kids and family that there is very little me left and its starting to get to the point where I can start finding me again, but now I want another child, so it would be another two to three years of waiting for me time.
Can anyone enlighten me on how going from two children to three especailly has impacted on your family? Im after all infor, good, bad, practical, stories whatever to help me make the decision if this is right for me and my family.

Marmee · #2 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 04:16 PM

3 is beautiful!

Our third baby is such a placid little man. In talking to lots of families with 3 children, I hear similar reports about baby no.3

Certainly, our lives are busier than with 2 ... but I believe they would be just as busy if we didnt have our third. When it comes down to it, most of our busyness is thanks to having an older boy and a toddler whose social engagements keep us going!

I'd definitley say we are richer for having our 3rd baby

Monkeymum · #3 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 05:38 PM

good to hear!! sometimes I think I'm a little mad for having number 3 but then again I see myself with more than 3 (eek) down the track.

kristamumof3 · #4 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 06:47 PM

I also spent some time asking everyone about what it was like going from 2 to 3. There is a thread on here about it.

Let me start by saying that I can't imagine my life without 3. 2 just seems too easy now. It is hectic and crazy and any little tiny bit of me time is completely gone. I can't talk to my friends on the phone for longer than about 5 mins. I can''t keep on top of the housework. Just keeping up with the laundry is insane. But I love every minute - even the minutes that I find insanely difficult.

Someone said - probably on here - that the only child you ever regret is the one that you don't have.

Gotta go and put out a fire!

**Marguerite** · #5 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 07:29 PM

Found it

I must say I felt like a stalker doing a search by username.

kristamumof3 · #6 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 08:36 PM

Thanks for finding that thread. It was fun to read back over it. I don't mind if you "stalk" me at all.

There was a wonderful sense of mastery in having the 3rd baby. I really knew what I was doing and didn't stress about anything at all. She responded beautifully to my way of parenting. It really didn't get hard for me until she was about 18 months.

With 3 I definately have that feeling of completion that people often talk about. I don't think that this will ever stop me being "clucky" because I just LOVE babies but a family of 5 is perfect for us.

Jasper · #7 (**permalink**) 25-09-2008, 10:05 PM

Thanks for that. I thought I was done with two, I always said Id only ever have two girls, but to say thats it for all eternity always stuck in my throat. I love my girls dearly but would love a son too. I dont feel that my family is fully complete yet, but like I said, I ahve fears about pregnancy and how I would afford and deal with three kids.
I guess you never know till ya do it really do you? Its just such a big thing, like two is the 'norm' and fairly expected, but more than that and its likea whole new territory.

cath3boys · #8 (**permalink**) 26-09-2008, 10:59 PM

I too had really bad morning sickness with my first two. I also suffered from post-natal depression after the birth of my second. But after much communication with my partner and GP, we went ahead and had baby 3, our third son! I have days when my houses looks like a cyclone has come through and there is the endless pile of washing, but those are easily forgotten when I am sitting snuggled up on the lounge with my 3 little men or watching the older two kiss their baby brother.

I agree with Marmee, my 6 year and 3 year old is what keeps me busy. Baby 3 just goes with the flow, he is such a placid little fella. Makes me think about possibly having bubba #4!

Jamie · #9 (**permalink**) 29-09-2008, 07:27 PM

I find three sooo much more work than 2. I can't believe how much more washing and mess there is going from 4 to 5 people in the house.
I have also found it difficult having a newborn when my eldest is at the stage of being at school. I've found that school completely messed with my baby's sleep patterns ie. I have to wake him to take her to school in the morning, then wake him again to pick her up in the afternoon, after about 10mins sleep each time. A nightmare.
When there were two I found that I would buy two of things so that they would have one each, but now there are three is isn't really feasible. I guess we could probably still afford it as DH is on a good wage, but it seems ridiculous to buy three of everything.
I love him and truely believe he is a gift after such a difficult pregnancy, but I'm finding that it is as much work as what i expected there would be from having 4 kids, not three.

Jasper · #10 (**permalink**) 30-09-2008, 10:48 AM

Thank you for your honest opinion Jamie. I agree that it would be difficult with all that going on. I want another in my heart, but in my head I feel I might not cope so well. Oh well, who knows what will happen, Im not even preg yet so not too late to consider everything!