Encouraging respect for dolls

[MindfulMama]

DS is nearly 18 months old. Both he & I have Steiner dolls which we take places, feed, have in a sling, sleep with etc. DH & I treat the dolls with respect & love - as we treat DS.

DS on the other hand delights in throwing them on the ground then looking at his hands as if to say "naughty hands, did you do that?" It's somewhat cute, but also not something we wish to encourage as we would like for him to experience a nurturing relationship with the dolls.

Our approach has been to model gentle behaviour with the dolls and when he throws them to say "balls are for throwing, dolls are for loving", and if he continues then saying dolls like kisses & cuddles and throwing isn't a nice thing to do, and then if he persists one of us will pick up the doll from the ground, give it a kiss then carry it around or put it on the doll table.

What we're doing isn't having any effect, so obviously we need another perspective Is this something developmentally appropriate & best ignored? Is there another way we could handle things? WDYT?

[*kaos*]

I don't think I can give you a really good answer as none of my kids have really been into dolls.

I think modelling the behaviour you wish to see towards dolls is going to be the best way to get him to change his behaviour.

Just throwing this out there, but why do you want him to treat a toy like a person? It's a toy... You talk about a nurturing relationship with a doll, but how can it be a relationship when it doesn't interact back with him. That would involve some pretty high level imaginative play (knowing what the dolls response would be in any given situation). Perhaps he sees it as a toy. Maybe it is fun to throw it up and see what happens to it. It's his way of interacting with it.

[Marguerite]

It's a bit of a Steiner thing Kara, that dolls represent people so we should care for them as such.

I wonder if getting a reaction from you is something that your DS is enjoying? Like you are already doing, I would model the appropriate behavior and with an 18 month old not make too much of a deal about it but say something along the lines of gentle hands with our baby and if necessary remove it from play.

[*kaos*]

Oh, ok - but is it realistic that a child under 18 months understand that concept?

[Marguerite]

I think it is ok to model the way you would like to see them treating their belongings at that age.

[MindfulMama]

thanks for offering your perspectives - much appreciated