Preparing for birthing

liz_gcmama · #1 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 12:53 PM

When do most people start emotionally, mentally etc preparing for the birth?

I've got... more than two months, less than three months left to go... Is it normal to be going through this already?

I'm concerned that my labour will slow down once we go to hospital. DD was induced and DS... well we barely made it to the hospital (even with an ambulance trip), so there was no opportunity for the labour to slow down (literally 1 min after entering the labour ward he was born).

This time I realise more that we don't have time to "mess around" as I don't really want another ambulance transfer. We can't afford a private midwife for a home birth and I am too worried something will go wrong in an unassisted birth.

I am trying to get through all these worries NOW so that I will be free of them when it comes time to bring my baby into the world.

I'm also trying to work out if I have any friends I could have as a support person - whether that would make me more comfortable, particularly with the transferring...

I'm getting so hormonal and emotional over it all already and I have ages before this baby is "cooked"!

fayble · #2 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 12:57 PM

I had all the same issues. Its not too soon and probably a good thing because it will give you time to really work out your options.

I found writing down what I wanted and my fears was really helpful then I work them all through one by one.

Trust your body and your support people.

~twiddlebug~ · #3 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 01:02 PM

Gee, before baby is 'cooked' sounds like the perfect time to be dealing with this stuff! Leave those last few weeks to nesting urges and positive birthing affirmations

Uncertainty will stress you unnecessarily, a support person for you is a great idea. Having your support person lined up well in advance is imperative, she needs to know what your hopes are for this birth.

What makes you think your labour will slow once you reach the hospital? I get not wanting to leave the transfer too late (hey, no-one wants to birth in the hospital foyer :vomit ) but if you wait till well into 2nd stage what are you thinking will happen when you get there?

liz_gcmama · #4 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 01:21 PM

LOL If I wait until well into second stage the baby will be born in the car!

I had a 20min second stage with DD and DS was 40mins but only cause I wasn't prepared to birth at home!

I had a doula lined up for DS's birth... She moved during the pregnancy and made it here in time for me to hop in the bath and then missed the birth entirely. She was actually fairly useless in the end (particularly post partum which is part of what I wanted) but she lived 90mins+ away by this point and was pregnant herself (found out the day of my mother blessing). I would really like to have someone else with me, but I just can't think of anyone I know that I would want... I'm not close with anyone IRL who has had a natural birth!

I've also started thinking about a mother blessing and what i want for that... of course i'll be breaking with ettiquite and hosting it myself because I have no one to host it for me. People around me just don't seem to get natural birth...

I will have to think more seriously about a support person because, like you said, we're going to need to talk with them about it pretty soon.

Liz

KristinC · #5 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 09:27 PM

Have you read birthing from within? I think you might find it useful.

liz_gcmama · #6 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 10:08 PM

I read it in my second pregnancy... my doula lent it ro me... i might try to get a hold of another copy...

Liz

*kaos* · #7 (**permalink**) 18-10-2007, 10:45 PM

With two kids, I'm sure you are somewhat pressed to give yourself the time to prepare.....

I started preparing from 32 weeks onwards. It was when I started doing pre-natal yoga, and it really puts me in a good mind set for the birth. It gave me the time and the motivation I needed to think.

I think that a support person would be great for you. Someone who knows your fears and can help calm you, whether it be a fast labour progressing at home, or giving you suggestions to maintain labour in a hospital. Just sounds like your dilemma is where to find such a person

mammadyl · #8 (**permalink**) 19-10-2007, 12:18 AM

Could your husband be your support person?

liz_gcmama · #9 (**permalink**) 19-10-2007, 11:15 AM

DH will be there (As long as he makes it home from work in time if he's at work when labour starts) but I'm feeling the need to be nurtured by women... Both now and probably in labour... with DH likely to take 2 hours to get home from work if he is at work when labour starts... I don't really want to labour alone... my labour with DS was 4 hours... (and that was prolonged by ambulance trip as I wasn't going to give birth in the ambulance!)